Bachelor Monday: February 14

14 02 2011

The producers of The Bachelor mustve licked their lips in pure satification and pure good-fortune at the thought of The Bachelor landing on February 14th…Valentines Day.

it’s almost too perfect…

If you were alone tonight, was there really anything more appropriate to be doing than watching The Bachelor with a box of chocolates and a bubbly beverage?

On that note… the Bachelor Drinking game phrase tonight was: ‘Can I be honest with you?’ – if you were playing that game, your feelings of loneliness would’ve been masked by a tipsy comatose by 9 o’clock.

First 1-1 date was with…surprise surprise…Emily. Do ya think he likes this girl? He takes her to a deserted sand dune in the middle of the aqua ocean with nothing but a picnic and fire to keep them occupied. My first thought was… where’s the port-o-potty…but that’s just unromantic, practical, tiny bladdered me. He promises to give her a rose…but doesnt actually HAVE one to give. He also pushes her to her maternal edge by asking to meet her daughter because next week is…meet the family. She did a great job of politiking her way out of that question…

The second 1-1 date was doomed to fail. How do you follow a day on an island paradise with Emily? Britt may be just as blonde…but she has barely an ounce of personality, and barely an ounce of sexual prowess. And she breaks the number one rule of The Bachelor. Never say ‘I have a hard time showing my emotions’… its your ticket out of Bachelor town. And it was the poison that sent her home this week… Brad gave her the humiliating break up speech and sent her packing.

the last 1-1 date was a cultural day of interaction with Shawntel… the funeral director. I kinda like this girl… she has a real-life job, and a real-life personality, it’s refreshing. Brad seems to think so too… anything would be better than the awkward cliff jumping with Britt.

The Group date was a bust. First of all… what kind of a date is it being dragged out of your bed pre-dawn to perform for a photoshoot? A bad one. A terrible date idea. The girls rolled around in the sand, didnt hesitate to go topless and seethed at the amount of sexual energy there was between Brad and Michelle. Michelle admits that she’s ‘done a little modelling and acting’…yep, she’s got a curiously blocked IMDB page… but that’ll all come out in US next week.

So Brad has to reassure each girl that he still has feelings for her… and each takes their turn doing the ugly ‘send me home’ cry. It’s pathetic and totally unattractive…but seems to be necessary.

At the Rose ceremony – Brad for-go’s the cocktail party because he’s made up his mind. I love a man that takes control. sigh. Brad keeps his promise with Emily, gives a rose to Shawntel, Ashley is safe… and he chooses Chantel over Michelle.

If you thought Michelle was going to have a freak out of epic proportions… she opted for the cut-eye, silent treatment that means… she is plotting to steal Brad’s first born, or howl outside his window until a restraining order is issued. You know she’s that kind of girl.

I can’t wait to see the hometown dates… always my favourite episode! But now that crazy Michelle is gone…will there be enough drama to keep the show afloat?

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2 responses

17 02 2011
Michael Schwartz

Totally agree with you about everything!
Emily is by far my favourite, with Shawntel a close second.
Next week should still be fun without the B*tch.

17 02 2011
C Sheppard

Michelle was hired to be crazy… let the real drama begin! You can’t beat a good, ole fashioned on-screen heartbreak for great TV.

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