DWTS: Season 14 Winner…

23 05 2012

… is probably not who you expected.

Am I right?

By now you’ve heard/seen that Donald Driver (Greenbay Packer) won the coveted mirrorball trophy in last night’s DWTS Season 14 Finale.

I’ll admit it. I was way off. I thought Donald would come third, behind the latin lover, and that the Welsh Wiggler would take top spot. Katherine was in top spot all season long, where other stumbled along the way, she was consistantly the front runner and the one pushing the envelope. But that’s not the ONLY way to win this show. You have to have fan support from day one, you have to peak at the right time, and you have to deliver a knock out in the final round.

I think that William had a chance, but did NOT deliver the most memorable final freestyle. I think Katherine might have peaked slightly early, and did not always have the middle america vote (remember what I said week 1… she’s European, she might have a slight disadvantage. Now you believe me… I’m not accusing America of racism, but it’s a factor). America would much rather see a sports hero from a beloved franchise come from behind and take the title! That’s the story they wanted.

So Donald Driver is the 14th person to win DWTS… congrats Donald, your stock is through the roof, good way to spend an off season.


DWTS Week 7 Elimination

2 05 2012

We had a Classical Gas this week on DWTS (see what I did there? ‘Classical Gas’. google it.) but the results show must go on.

There were some really great performances last night, enhanced by the orchestral sounds of the most classical of classical music (minus the classical version of Bad Romance… of course).

Maria had a perfect 10 score, Donald Driver continued to impress, The Brit stle Karina wardrobe and rocked it, William didnt take his shirt off and danced like a gentleman, Melissa…. tried, Urkel was steady but not stellar, Roshon still looks like a 13 year old dancing at a grandparents 50th anniversary party.

In jeopardy last night? Roshon and Urkel.

I’ll admit, I was slightly surprised.

Roshon I count on being in the bottom, but there were worse dancers than Urkel last night. In particular, I thought Melissa would finally be a bottom dweller… but apparently, she’s got more fan support than Urkel. Is it the audience  demographic? Are there more people my mom’s age voting, than my age? It’s the same thing – she grew up on Little House and I grew up on Family Matters… so is my generation to blame? Roshons generation can’t stay up past 10 pm to vote.

ANyways, the two paris did the new ‘dance battle’ nonsense. However, this time Tom clearly stated, or prefaced,  that the judges would use ONLY that dance to determine the pair to save. They had to make that clear, otherwise the obvious choice is to send home the perennial bottom feeder, Roshon.

It was in their hands, and they chose to save the kid… again.

Urkel eliminated from DWTS, week 7.



DWTS Season 14: Week 4 Results

11 04 2012

They told us it would be ‘shocking’.

We’d been warned.

On the DWTS results show last night, after a mediocre night of dancing masked by kitschy ‘rock n roll’ iconogrpahy and imagery, we were left puzzled by the elimination.

As I said, Tom did a great job of pre-warning us for a wave of confusion over the eliminated dancer. As the night went on, dancer after dancer was ‘safe’ leaving only a few marquee players left to remain in jeopardy.

Roshon, a judges favourite last night, was sent to the red glow of jeopardy. Also, fan favourite Sherri Shepherd rounded out the bottom 2.

I dont disagree… I just think there were other dancers who couldve been in that bottom 2 BEFORE these two. In my opinion, and if it was the only one that counted, I wouldve liked to see Melissa Gilbert in the bottom, also, Gladys Knight or even William Levy. They all had lacklustre dances, or major screw ups during their performances.

Sherri was just subpar for HER standards, and I dont think she excelled in a dance that was dark and brooding. Roshon probably doesnt have many FANS who watch this show. Even my grandmother isnt voting for him, so I think he could be doomed by the demographic.

Who did the red glow of elimination shine upon?

get ready for the ‘shocker’… Sherri Shepherd.

Crazy right? One slightly off week and the rug gets pulled out from under you. This is particularly painful because Sherri Shepherd has been campaigning HARD to be on this show, and has admited that it has been a long time dream of hers to compete. I saw her gaining traction, I also thught she was a sparkplug in this cast… it’s really sad to see someone with her energy and joi de vive leave so early.

But that’s reality TV, and that’s what happens when the public gets to vote. Democracy can be so cruel.



DWTS Season 13 Winner

23 11 2011

and the winner is…

(should I make you sit through 2 hours of fluff before I tell you? No, that would be cruel… right ABC?)

JR Martinez wins the mirrorball trophy and is the DWTS Champion for Season 13!

He was the best dancer from night 1, when nobody knew who he was. He had some seriously memorable dances, including his Freestyle that might have given him the final edge in voting.

Who knows how ‘close’ this was… according to the TV Night Prediction Poll – 55% chose JR to Win, while about 38% chose Rob Kardashian and something like 8% chose Ricki.

Let me go into this a little deeper. Why was Ricki written off by fans? She had a 1 in 3 shot at the title… but only got 8% of the votes on our poll. This seemed to be the gerneal opinion… that Ricki was absolutley not in the running to win last night. Interesting. So much so, that the producers revealed the ‘third place finisher’ early on in the show… because there was no real drama, somehow we knew it would be Ricki. Was it her performance on monday night’s show, or was this building? I can’t put my finger on it, but at one point Ricki Lake was a front runner, and touted as the potential winner… she’s probably asking the same thing today, what happened?!

Not that it matters… she got a new body, more than 15 minutes of ‘fame’, and a new show (and a bonus for making the finals)

So then the Top 2 were Rob Kardashian and JR Martinez. 3 weeks ago i wouldve cried foul and thought it was a joke. But Rob came out guns ablaze at the finale, and his sisters were in the house. Kris Jenner wouldve been so proud, that the two biggest newsstories (sadly) were her two moneymakers/children. I am actually still flabbergasted that of all the Kardashian/Jenners willing..nay, begging for more TV time… Rob was the one DWTS chose.

Anyways, he had a good run… he’ll get a show, and he’ll exhauset the TV circuit with his new moves and ‘passion for dance’.

Now… What does this mean for JR? Only time will tell, but think of the title brings to all winners. They are all household names, they show up as hosts on bad ABC competition pilots, they become People Magazine darlings, they will always have a front row seat in the DWTS audience, they will offer ‘advice’ to future contestants, and most of all, they can now afford that house in the hills. Oh yah, JR’s star is rising big time and there ain’t nobody ‘hotter’ right now.


Congrats tot he best dancer of the season, and the Winner of Season 13 JR Martinez!

DWTS: Semi Finals Results

16 11 2011

The semi final reslts were read on DWTS last night, that is of course after we saw performances by a group of pre-pubescent dancers, product placements, a performance by The Muppets, and the usual recapping that takes… a full 55 minutes to complete.

We all know how i feel about these results shows.

IN any case… we found out fairly early that Hope was ‘in jeopardy’… no real surprise. And then we learned that, horror of horrors, JR MArtinez was also in jeopardy. The hosts are quick to point out taht this doesnt necessarily mean these dancers were both in the bottom.

This of course always gets me thinking… its a script. Obviously, JR had a hard night on monday (read my review to remind yourselves) but producers know jsut as well as we do… JR needs to be in the finals to bring legitimacy to the show. Also, who doesnt LOVE a rise from the ashes story. JR will get his chance to regain top form nex week because….

Hope Solo eliminated from DWTS last night.

again, not a huge surprise, and I’m personally very happy to see her go. I was not a huge fan (understatement).

So your final 3, who will dance for the mirrorball trophy are:
Ricki Lake
JR MArtinez
and Rob Kardashian. (wow…)



DWTS Week 4 Elimination

13 10 2011

The first real ‘contender’ fell away too early on DWTS week 4.

It wasn’t a TOTAL blinsided shock, after an epic collapse in her performance, Chynna Phillips went down as the results were read.

Like I said after the performance, normally… this kind of blip could be ‘overcome’ in the next week. It would become ‘the struggle’ and ‘the triumph’ storyline that we love so much.

But there was always something a little bit vulnerable about Chynna. Even though she had received Top scores for 3 straight weeks, I worried about her fan base. She also lacked in personality, something other contestants have in spades…

So Chynna is eliminated, and once again proving that scores mean nothing in this competition, Chaz continues to evade the bottom 3.

DWTS Elimination Week 3

5 10 2011

The seasons first ‘shocker’ on last night’s DWTS elimination.

It’s week 3, it happens.

The obvious terrible dancers are cut off in teh first two weeks, then week 3 and 4 are traditionally weeks that ‘bubble’ weeks – where people who had ‘potential’ go home.

Some may call last night’s results ‘shocking’… but honestly, look at the situation in full context.

Kristen Cavallari was eliminated last night.

This is a girl who is considered less famous than Rob Kardashian, because she isnt related to the ‘K’ clan. This is also a girl who is notorious for being a ‘witch’ (family blog) on reality TV… like 5 years ago. This is also a girl who is young, blonde, LA-faced and had absolutely NO story to tell when given the chance last night. No story will never will you the mirrorball trophy. There was no connection with the audience, except perhaps the awkward ‘my ex finacee is in the audience tonight to watch me shake my booty to Beyonce’.

Even terrible dancers, like Chaz or Carson, know that this competition isnt all about ‘the talent’. You need either a winning perosnality (which she doesnt have) or a compelling backstory (which she doesnt have).

So, that’s my explanation for last night


%d bloggers like this: